Ready or Not

This one will be short-ish and sweet...or at least that's the plan. So each year at Bethel we have the opportunity to go on a mission trip. There were probably over 40 trips available, all of which will be overseen by amazing leaders, and as I was reading over the list and trip descriptions nothing really jumped out at me. I thought, Oh, Ireland would be cool; and the Iceland trips sounds like fun; or I'd love to go back to England just because I loved that trip during first year and their accents are the best! But nothing really grabbed my attention, if you know what I mean. That's probably because I already knew where I wanted to go and where I had felt the Lord drawing me to.

A couple of weeks prior to the mission trip applications opening up, we had a revival group party (our revival group or RG is like our family away from home; it's a group of about 60 people that we're connected with at school to do life and share with throughout the year). At the RG party, our RGP, or revival group pastor, Sara, had mentioned that one of the options for a mission trip would be an RG trip, and ours in particular was to Los Angeles. Ya'll, I drove through L.A. on the way here four years ago when I did first year...that place is crazy. I didn't really care to go back. My mom and I did the whole walking around the Chinese Theatre, seeing the Hollywood sign, etc. There was nothing during that time that said "Oooo, I'd LOVE to come back here one day!" Nevertheless, God is funny; hilarious actually.

Recently (within the past couple of years, and even more so since I've been here in California), I've felt a pull towards L.A. I really want to see people experience the love of God, and where better to do that than the City of Angels? I also feel like God has given me a heart for celebrities and those in the entertainment industries in general, and whether I ever actually meet anyone in that industry or simply pray for them from a distance, I have a chance to impact their city through loving it and praying over it while actually being in it!

I'm sure you've guessed it by now - the L.A. trip was my first choice; it wasn't even a question when the applications came out really, because as Sara spoke about this trip during our RG party, I knew that this was where I wanted to be and felt like God wanted to do something in and through me there. So here's the proof:
I've officially been accepted to the L.A. trip in March, and I'd love for you to partner with me. The total trip cost is $600 with the first deposit of $200 due by Dec. 5th. If you'd like to sow into this trip financially, you can copy and paste the link at the end of this post in your browser and continue from there.

Just as important as financial support is prayer support. I really want to make the most and get the most out of this trip. I want to grow in loving people and serving a city. I'd like you to partner with me in prayer specifically for taking risks (stepping out of my comfort zone), loving people intentionally, divine appointments/connections, and expecting miraculous things to happen as our team is directed by Holy Spirit.

While I wasn't ever planning on going back to L.A. for any amount of time, ready or not, here I come!

FINANCIAL SUPPORT LINK: https://trips.ibethel.org/transactions/new/16498
*Be sure you see my first and last name on the donation page before submitting your donation

Because I asked...

So we've recently been assigned our next reading for homework, which is Bill Johnson's newest book, "God is Good." I'm sure many of us have heard the saying "God is good," to which we respond "all the time," and vice versa. The question is, do we really believe that He is good all the time -  always, now and forevermore, past, present and future, in all circumstances, when we experience His goodness and when we don't seem to experience it? Do we say He's good because that's what Christians do? Or do we say it because we think He's good for the most part, yet in the back of our mind we're questioning it? Or do we say He's good and believe it on a conscious level but not in our subconscious? How in the world would we even know if we believe that in our subconscious anyway? It's our subconscious for crying out loud - you know, the part that's not conscious. 

Well, I think we can say God is good and believe it, but our responses/reactions to various situations will determine whether we actually believe it in our subconscious. When we get in a tight spot or a tough situation, our emotions will probably reveal whether we believe the statement "God is good" and whether or not we believe it with every part of our brain/thinking. Because if He's good, then we'll trust Him with every area of our life (and others' lives for that matter) - every up and down, the good and bad, and sometimes the ugly - and we'll be at peace. The angels, in their introduction of Jesus's birth, announced, "...peace on earth and goodwill towards men" (Luke 2:14). Bill states in his book that "this decree revealed God's heart more clearly than ever before" as "it redefined God's intent for humanity." So, if we actually believe that God is good, then surely we will live in what the Bible says that He has given us - peace and [His] goodwill or kindly intent. 

Anyway, that was just a little tidbit of info and really just my thoughts, so feel free to agree or disagree. I'm only in the second chapter of the book, so this is definitely not a book report or review of any kind whatsoever, nor am I an expert on this topic; I just needed something to introduce my testimony from today :) 

So here's why I'm really writing; this morning as I was getting ready for church, a good friend of mine was texting me pictures of various jackets she was trying on in the store - this is how long-distance shopping is done people - to which I would respond  with a "yes," or "oh, I like that one," or "eh, I like the first one better," in between throwing my pants on and brushing my teeth...you know, those important things when getting ready for church or being in public in general.  Well, when we were pretty much finished with our conversation/shopping she sent me a text and was like "hey, you know that money you've been putting back for me?" (I guess I should preface that with the fact that she had given me some money a few months ago to put back for something she was saving up for - you know, there are some people who are really great savers, and then there are those of us like my friend and I that need it to be out of reach so we don't spend it.) She continued with "I want you to use that money toward groceries."  

Why did I start crying at this point? Well, let me tell you. What my friend didn't know was that I had LITERALLY just asked the Lord (like one or two minutes prior), "Lord, would you give me some grocery money today?" as I looked in my fridge and cabinet at the bleak appearance of what meals would look like this week. I could do nothing but sit in the fact that God actually is good; that He listens; that when we ask, we actually receive. I'm sure some would say, "Oh, that's just a coincidence." Well, it may have been for you, but for me, it was a conscious choice to contribute this "coincidence" to the goodness of God - sometimes things are too random NOT to be God, and if we posture our hearts to believe He is good and thank Him for the things that may seem random, then we'll be more aware of Him when He actually is doing things. Just a thought anyway. 

I was seriously blown away by God's goodness and faithfulness through my friend's generosity, which didn't seem like much to her, but it was huge for me, not because of the amount, but because of the revelation that what I ask actually matters to the God of the universe, and that my words are actually really powerful. Sure, I could have just transferred over some money from my savings to get groceries for the week, but instead I asked Papa God if he would give me some grocery money. If I asked God for grocery money and He gave it to me, what else is He waiting for me to ask Him for? What other areas in my life is He waiting for me to partner with Him in? Ephesians 3:20 says "[He] is able to do above and beyond all that we ask or think..." I mean, have you ever imagined or dreamed up your best life possible? If there were no limitations, what would you imagine your perfect life being like? Guess what, it doesn't even come close to whatever your heavenly Daddy has thought up for you. He's a good daddy - we already have access to all that's His; I think He's waiting for us to start dreaming bigger and asking Him for  the crazy, impossible things - I asked for grocery money; what will happen when I ask Him (and believe) to use me to rock my city or nation with His goodness? 

The Giver...Oh wait, that's already a title.

Ok, as a language arts teacher, I just couldn't resist the title. Show grace for my inner nerd! Now let's get "spiritual" - kind of.

"I just LOVE asking people for money and giving them the opportunity to bless me financially..." said no one ever. Well, there may actually be people that like doing that, but I have a hard time with that. As a short-term missionary for two years, and then going off to ministry school and still needing financial support for a third year, I have a really hard time asking people for money, because that's all that I felt like I was doing - simply asking people for money. What's funny about that is I actually love getting gifts and surprises, so why is it so hard to ask for or receive money from people in the form of financial support? The Lord has been bringing up a lot of questions lately that have me questioning the way I think about...well, just about everything. So here's what I've learned about the whole giving/receiving thing recently:

As someone who has always struggled with money (working for it, managing it, receiving it, etc.) I've recently come into a place where I actually have it and know how to better manage it thanks to Jake Strickland and Paul Walker who so amazingly blessed our church by teaching Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University the year that I got back from school of ministry. This completely changed my world and gave me a drive to get of out debt so that I could start giving to others at a greater level. The Lord provided work for me during this time so that I would have a steady income to start working towards my goal and dream of being debt free and in a place to give abundantly to those in need, and while I still have some areas to work on, three years later I'm still using my budgeting tools and managing my money like I never have! I even have a small amount of savings (and I mean small), which is a miracle in and of itself! 

Most of you who know me know that I've recently returned to California to complete my second year of ministry  school, and you have already blessed me tremendously with your love and support. Before I left home, I wasn't going to ask anyone for money. I worked hard and used savings to pay most of my tuition and to cover initial housing/living costs since I wouldn't have a roommate for about a month or so when I got out here, and it's a decent chunk of change for deposits and rent! Luckily I have amazing people in my life who love me enough to bless me anyways when I'm too stubborn to ask for help. My parents are seriously the best and most generous people I know, and helped tremendously on the drive, that's right, the DRIVE out. We drove two vehicles across the country, and they put up with me for 2-3 weeks, slept on crappy beds and air mattresses, and went on mini sight-seeing adventures just because they love me. The only difference is that they had to drive back across the country. Yes, there's no denying that they're amazing! Next, there is my home church family who ridiculously loves and blesses me anyway, but they went above and beyond to bless me financially, cover me in prayer, and shower me with love leading up to my departure. And last, but surely not least, are the friends and family who have donated in various ways. You are all amazing!

I've already been blessed so much, which almost makes it harder to even ask for money at this point. My thinking is (as I'm sure many others would be): I've already been blessed so much, I'm working and actually have a job, and God has provided in many different ways already; how can I ask for such generosity to be extended from those I love? That actually sounds really nice and spiritual, but when we often get to the underlying ways that we think it sounds more like this: What if people think I'm lazy or not working enough, or they think I should have just been responsible and kept a good job while I had one, or maybe I'm just not worth giving to, so I shouldn't even ask. 

Let's just be real. When we analyze our thought processes, a lot of them don't line up with what Jesus says or thinks about us at all, and I love that Bill Johnson says, "I can't afford to have a thought in my head that's not in His." So this is just one of those thought processes that I've been dealing with lately and God is showing me that there's more to giving than just me asking and receiving; it's also about the giver. 

I've had opportunities recently to bless different people in small ways, and in seeing their happiness and thankfulness I was blessed beyond measure and in those moments I felt like the Lord said: "Do you see how amazing it feels to bless these people? How do you think I feel when I can bless you? How do you think those who love you feel when they get to bless you?"

And ya'll, all I can say is He totally "got" me with this. I just hadn't really thought about how much of a blessing it can be to give when you're really giving out of the generosity of your heart for those you love. Before I left, I had a friend, who's more like a father, tell me, "Don't you dare rob me of an opportunity to bless you! If you need ANYTHING you better let me know." And it's almost one of those things to which you say "yeah, yeah," but now I actually get it. This friend really meant what he said, and in light of recent events I now understand the joy it can be to bless others whether in small or big ways, and sometimes it may seem small, but it can be huge for the person you're blessing. 

All that to say, here's where I am: I am currently working, and my sole purpose in coming out here two months before school started was to get a job so I could get on top of my finances and "not struggle." I'm pretty sure God laughed at that too...as I'm sure He does with the way we think about many things. Well, I was getting decent work hours before school started, but my flexibility has been limited since school has begun, and as I'm budgeting and doing those things I know to do I'm also realizing it's not quite enough. I'm completely trusting the Lord to be my Provider. I literally told Him the other day that He was the "man of the house" and He needed to take care of the electric bill and rent. As children of God we have access to the resources of heaven...hello, this is unlimited resources! And while I know He WILL provide (it's no longer a matter of "if" or "what if"), I also realize there are people who love me and want to sow into my life and partner with what God is doing. And sometimes we just need an opportunity to be generous with what we do have simply for the sake of experiencing the joy of giving so that we receive a greater revelation of how the Father feels when we allow Him to provide for our needs and give to us, which is what He did for me recently. 

So here are some ways you can sow into my life financially for those that feel this is what you really want to do or you think the Lord is asking you to do:

1. You can give on a monthly basis or through a one-time donation through PayPal by selecting the "click here to make a donation" option at the top left side of my blog (under my profile picture), which will take you directly to a PayPal link where you can send money through your own PayPal account, by debit/credit, or by a checking account, or you can send a check/money order if you prefer (email me for the address: m.d.henderson8@gmail.com). These gifts are not tax-deductible, so if you wish to give in a different way that is tax-deductible continue reading :)
2. You can also sow into my time here at Bethel by donating towards my ministry and/or mission trip opportunities, which are tax-deductible. One thing that I'm able to do as a second year student is go on ministry trips throughout the year with various leaders from the church on top of the option to go on a mission trip at the end of the year. The great thing about the ministry trips is that I can go on as many as possible (dependent upon finances and work schedule) throughout the year, and I will be part of each leader's ministry team where I can grow in my gifts, talents and leadership, and also learn from the different leaders, which can open up amazing doors/opportunities while here. To give this way, simply follow the directions below:

• Select or copy/paste the following link: https://trips.ibethel.org/transactions/new/16140
• This should be a direct link to my travel fund account through Bethel, so make sure you see my name displayed on the page
• From there you will fill out basic information and click "next"
• You will then type in your payment information and click "submit"

I thank the Lord for the opportunities He gives me to give and receive, because they both keep me humble and teach me more about His nature. He's a good God who also likes to give and receive; and us, being created in His image, should be the same. Thank you to all of you who love and support me no matter what that looks like; just the fact that you're reading this and thinking about me is enough! I declare your thoughts, love, prayers, and finances all seeds to be sewn and harvested with much return! 

That time when Holy Spirit totally ambushed me...

My first "note" to update friends and family. Well, clearly I've made it back to California, which has been really amazing; I've seen family, I've been to Portland ("Keep Portland Weird" - and it definitely was), I got my parents to hike...on a mountain trail that was much longer and more difficult than expected, I also got them to go rafting ("You won't get wet," she said...as we're soaked within the first few minutes), I've been able to reconnect with some old friends and connect with new ones, both of which have made my heart full, and now I'm finally registered for my second year at Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry. Jesus really does love me; even before I got here He had it all planned out, but I'll just hit the highlights for now.

Before I came back to Bethel and California I was believing the Lord for some specific things: 

• My car debt to be paid in full before I left Georgia
• My tuition to be paid in full before I left Georgia
• My housing to be situated by the time I got to California
• My job situation to be secured by the time I got to California
• Divine appointments and connections while here
• God moments that define my future

Well, everything on that list hasn't happened, and some things have, just not in the timing that I planned, but that doesn't change God's faithfulness. My tuition was paid in full before school started, my housing was lined up before I came, God totally opened up the right job for me within 2-3 weeks of being here, but the time before I began working was not wasted. I enjoyed some much needed quality time with my Jesus where He showed me that He was the "man of the house" and that He would take care of me during this time completely and totally providing in every way, which broke fear off of me that I've been battling for years. Those of you close to me (and now whoever reads this) know that I don't like to be alone at night; therefore, I sleep on the couch to feel safe. Go ahead, it's ok to laugh. I literally slept on the couch for my first 2-3 weeks here after my parents left when I had a perfectly good bed upstairs. Anyway, I think Jesus was like, "Ok, we need to get past this." So I gave Him my fear and He totally took care of it! Yay for sleeping in my bed!

Moving on to divine appointments/connections; I've already met people that I feel are lifetime friends and through them I've met even more people that I feel will be significant at some point on my journey this season, and I'm so excited for what God has in store!

So far that's four things on my list. And then there's that time when Holy Spirit totally ambushed me in which I would put in the category of "God moments that define my future," which of course, I'm expecting much more of as the year goes along.

So one of my new friends, a fellow Southerner who literally grew up about two hours from my hometown, is also a second year student at BSSM, and is now someone I would consider one of those "friends for life" told me about an event that was being hosted for second year students. My introvert immediately responded...ok screamed...with "Noooooo, there will definitely be too many people there for comfort. Actually, the fact that there will be people there at all is too much. Let's just stay in and be fine in our happy place where awkwardness and social interaction are at a minimal, and I don't have to take any risks." On the other hand, I had recently been challenged by my pastor to "get out" and meet new people, which he and I both knew was supposed to be part of my journey this season, so of course I had his voice ringing in the back of my mind, and knew I had to go even if just for a short time. If it got too bad, and by "bad" I mean too much for my introvert, I could always use the excuse that I had to get up early for work, which was actually true. Four a.m. was coming early! 

God loves to get us out of our comfort zones...don't you just hate that? 

Long story short, I end up going just expecting to meet maybe a couple of people and at the least just get out of the house for the sake of getting out of my comfort zone. This is the part where I'm pretty sure Papa God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit looked at each other and laughed. It ended up being a smaller group of maybe 15 people and we started off with a little worship at the lake. Then it moved to some prayer where Holy Spirit started to move and people were "getting crazy" - you know, the ones who shake and fall on the ground, and laugh and you take a step back and say, "You go ahead and enjoy that, I'm just gonna stay back here and worship in my own little happy place, you know, my island with just me and Jesus." And then God laughs again, and you realize you've been targeted. Things didn't get "crazy" for me, but I'm pretty sure Holy Spirit used almost every person there to just pour into me, and speak words of life and encouragement over me and release safety and love that I've never felt in a "new" place before, and I just cried...in front of these strangers...and then I cried some more, and at some point realized I had to stop worrying about my mascara because there was probably none left. I was like "Really, God? You know I don't like crying, much less crying in front of strangers." And I'm pretty sure He kind of laughed and said "I know." And then He sent someone else to do more damage...to my pride. So crying in front of strangers was in itself a breakthrough for me, but in that time I just felt like God was saying "I'm going to show you love like you've never known it before, not just from Me, but from people," which is really significant because many of us walk around with rejection and wounds whether we realize it or not, and it can become hard to feel safe being completely ourselves around others, especially new people in new seasons, but it's important to have that in our lives so we're not an island that's only dependent on God, but instead that we're a community being interdependent on each other as we go after God together. 

Ok, that long story made short was actually long, but it was shorter than originally planned, so be thankful. All that to say, God can totally ambush us with good surprises that encourage our hearts in the moments we least expect it, so whoever needs that as a testimony just take hold of it and wait expectantly on the One Who loves to surprise you. 

What's your history?

Eric Johnson shared a story about a friend of his who worked in the timber industry. He spoke of thin-cutting – a technique used by timber companies where they go into the woods and cut down, or thin out, a few trees. When they return after some time, several other trees will have fallen on their own.  Ok, sounds boring, but let’s get to the good part…the WHY. Why do these other trees fall down on their own? Maybe you already know the answer, but I had never heard of this before and it totally rocked me!

THE WHY
The trees that are in the center of the woods are never forced to put a root system down, because they’re protected by the other trees; so when you thin out the trees that have been that barrier the trees in the middle fall down easily with the first storm because it has no root system.

“We have to build OUR history with God in the secret place before we can in the corporate setting” (E. Johnson).  

Point 1: If we want to build a history with God corporately and see God do amazing things in our church, then we have to work at our personal relationship with Him when no one else is watching. Yeah, relationships are work...in case you haven't noticed. We have to pursue connection with the One who created us, which shouldn't be very hard since He pursued us first.

Point 2: Many people come to church hoping to GET something, but they don’t really have anything to GIVE back to the Body of Christ because they’re not building their own history with God; they’re relying on leadership and the rest of the body (who also have to build their own histories with God) for strength and nourishment. Don't get me wrong, we do get strength and nourishment from the church, but our main/daily source is God - His presence and His word. The truth is the church isn’t just a place to receive. It’s something to be a part of! It's a family!

If you want to see your church body rocked, then you have to let God rock you in the secret place. It’s a daily pressing in, a daily commitment to worship, a daily decision to choose Him. This is where we grow our root system, where we build our history with God, and where we become part of HIS story by adding to the Body of Christ. Are we building our histories with God? Are our root systems going deep in the secret place so they can go deep in the corporate setting? What's YOUR history?

What's in Front of You?

On speaking about “Hearing from God,” Jenn Johnson said, “Be faithful where you’re planted; build what’s in front of you.” OK, so what does being faithful have to do with hearing from God?  There are times God may ask you to do something crazy; maybe you’re at the grocery store and God says, “Go pray for that person down the aisle.” Then you begin to rationalize thinking that is probably just my mind making up crazy ideas; why would God ask me to do something so extreme and out of my comfort zone?  Or maybe God asks you to give the only $2 in your wallet to the homeless person on the corner. And again you begin to think that’s probably just my mind again. What can anyone do with $2? They probably won’t use it for anything good anyway. So maybe it wasn’t God. Maybe it was just your mind. Wouldn’t you rather have done it and it not been “from God,” than have missed an opportunity for obedience?

“There shouldn’t be a thought process between when God speaks and when we obey. When we obey, we don’t know what kind of chain reaction we’re starting.” (Jenn J.).  So let’s get to my real point. Maybe God hasn’t called you to do something so extreme and out of your comfort zone. Maybe He’s called you to “build what’s in front of you.” Maybe He’s told you to take your kid on a date night once a week, or have a family night, or take cookies to your neighbor or help your parents out around the house, or send a kind note to a co-worker. What are the everyday things that God has put right in front of you to build and be faithful in during this season?

I don’t think God asks us to do things just to see if we’ll be obedient, although that's part of it, but I think He asks us to do things to help build our faith, to build our character, so that we may grow and thrive as powerful people. Banning Liebscher has a great message about building what’s in front of you that he preaches on from Nehemiah.  He mentions that this is part of our process – building what’s in front of us. If God gave us everything we wanted before we went through a process it would probably kill us because we wouldn’t be prepared to handle the weight of a vision without character.  Banning says to “embrace the season and do it well [so] people will find you thriving in every part of the journey.” 

So what has God asked you to do? What are you called to build that is right in front of you? DO IT WELL! You never know what kind of chain reaction your small act of faithfulness/obedience will start.

 

Give it up!

Have you ever been around someone who is stressed ALL the time and found yourself becoming stressed or uptight when you’re around them? Or have you been around someone who is full of joy and found yourself feeling really happy and joyful? That’s because we all give off what we carry, whether it’s stress, frustrations, joy or peace. Kris Vallotton says, “You’ll always create the environment within you around you.” Whaaaaat?  Yeah, take that in for a minute. Whatever we are carrying around inside of us, whatever we’re allowing our minds to think about, whatever we’re holding in hearts will be released in the environment around us and everywhere we go.

We can have a huge impact on the environment around us (for better or worse) whether it’s at work, at home, at the grocery store, etc.  YOU LEAK! So what are you leaking right now? Are you leaking more stress and anxiety into a stressful situation or are you leaking love and peace? Are you leaking negativity into an already dark place or are you leaking hope and joy? Don’t let your junk leak on everyone else. Let Holy Spirit bring your junk to the surface and then leave it at the foot of the Cross.  There’s an alternative gift that Holy Spirit wants to give you for every negative thing you lay down to Him (ie. If you leave stress, you pick up the gift of peace). So give it up! Give up your junk and take a better gift! Gifts are always good…AND they’re free!

Someone told me today that I have a lot of tolerance; that’s because I’ve walked it out. I carry peace because I have chosen peace over stress when stressful situations come up. I’ve chosen peace when everything around me is turmoil. And in the place I’m at right now, I’m gaining even more tolerance because I’m choosing peace and patience in each situation that threatens my peace and patience.  I'm not saying I've "arrived," but I'm definitely moving forward in the process. Whatever difficult situation you’re facing, choose the opposite. Do it daily. Do it in every situation. Choose hope; choose love; choose joy; chose honor; choose peace. It starts with a choice. If you want to release it into the environment around you, you have to walk it out to get it within you first, and I guarantee it’ll be better than anything you give up!